Where Life begins

Life Begins at the edge of your comfort zone. This quote was on the wall when I went to the edge of my comfort zone and jumped off. Their are many reasons to go beyond the comfort zone. Some go for fun or adventure. Some may want to expand their horizons. Some may need the extra confidence to take another big step in life. Some just live on adrenaline and push themselves often.
I saw this quote on the wall in a sailboat. At that time I owned a kayak and that was the extent of my experience in water. But I flew with several friends to the Caribbean and took sailing lessons for a week. The three of us and our captain sailed​ around the islands on her boat. We studied every day, we snorkeled a couple of times, we learned a lot of sailing, and we had a great time. It was the time of my life. I have not sailed since. But I carry great memories of that week spent learning new things and having a great time. It was a tough week because everything was absolutely new to me. I came through with some bumps and bruises. There were a few jobs I was not fond of. But at the end of the week I felt confident the three of us could sail the boat short distances and get back to our starting point happily and safely. I saw beautiful waters, beaches, reefs, and fish. I tasted new foods. And I had many, many new experiences. I slept so well with the gentle rocking of the boat and the usually cool breeze. Everything was a first. And at the end of the week I was exhausted. I was thankful for time ashore, but I missed being on the boat. When I need a break from things I find sailing videos and let my mind drift back. I know I remember the best parts more than the tough parts. But that just makes better memories. When people ask if I would recommend going to a sailing school like this I always give a definite yes. It may not be for everybody. But it is a great experience and gives the opportunity to see places you might not see any other way. And it is a great way to get started if you plan to get into sailing even more.
I can highly recommend Captain Pat Nolan and sistership sailing school on the island of Tortola, British Virgin Islands. If you ever get the chance you should definitely go. I am thankful I had the opportunity.

The Sky is Falling

I grew up playing little league sports and loving it. Part of sports is learning how to win, how to lose, and how to keep going even things don't go your way. I've seen my friends put their children into sports or dance competitions or Ag competitions. Whether a child competes in rodeo or ice skating, he learns new skills, makes new friends and learns life lessons. When parents try to spare their children from disappointments and losses the life lessons are also lost. They do not learn to be happy for their friends who won. They do not learn to disagree and walk away friends. Every decision becomes a battle ground where lines are drawn and there is no going back. The senior class may vote on prom theme. Those who voted for the losing theme may decide not to go to prom because their theme was not chosen. Friendships may be lost because one friend voted for a different theme. Kids could go into years of counseling over the time wasted in all those years of schooling only to have the prom ruined by a horrid theme. The future of the entire class could rest on choosing the correct theme. The losing side could go on to become drug addicts who never have a stable life.
Does this sound ridiculous? Fast forward to modern politics. Each side believes all the lies written and published about the other side. Each side believes the country will cease to exist as we know it if the opposing party wins. There are Some important issues that I have definite opinions about. I can vote according to my beliefs. I can campaign to try to change the minds of others to vote my way. But losing is not the end. I now see my family split over who we support for President. I saw My family split 4 years ago over the same thing. Seriously?!? Is it worth selling or abandoning all I have to move to Canada? I have heard people from both sides threaten to leave the country based on the outcome of the election. I am afraid of what will happen. I have tried to read as much as possible in both sides so I can make an informed decision. I have learned That one side is free to post opinions or lies on the internet while the other side is attacked for posting anything in support of their candidate. I have never seen politics in such a sad state. I have never seen the country so divided. Each side has an all or nothing point of view and a loss means their world is over.
So what is the problem with our country? Is it just bad sportsmanship? Do we have too many adults who never learned how to lose and keep going? I think that is part of it. There is also a lot of anger. And a willingness to believe lies. Some do not trust anything published in major media. Some do not trust anything from political groups. Most of it is beyond me. But I know I miss the days when we could disagree on a meeting and walk out friends. I miss the times we could just agree to disagree. I miss the days when one's identity was not tied into how they voted.  We were all just Americans. It feels we have turned a corner and politics will never be the same. I know my family will never be the same. It will be hard to forget how we have been treated, talked to, and talked about over this election.

Personal Responsibility

Some things never change. I watch kids play and I notice two or three trying to make up the rules as they go so that they come out ahead. I can remember trying make up my own rules as a small child. I was quickly shut down by parents. But I sometimes still joke that the world would be a better place if everyone just did what I wanted. I could live in a world where I could do what I wanted, but punish others for doing the same things. I could take what I wanted from the store. No one could object. I could take days off and no one could object. Of I hit someone they could not hit me back. It would be my world.
But I cannot imagine the chaos of living in a world where everyone Did that. Everyone thought they could take what they wanted and no one had a right to complain or respond. People could kill one another and expect no punishment.  People could halfway finish a job and expect full payment. People could steal and blame it on the one they stole from. A world where no one bears any personal responsibility ..... I cannot imagine.
An ant cannot move a mountain alone. But an army of ants can move mountains if each one bears his own load.

Too

I do not know where to begin. Two more black men have been killed by police. The news media is flooded with witness accounts and videos. Social media is flooded with #BlackLivesMatter. And now 10 Dallas police officers have been shot by snipers during a protest. 3 of those officers are dead. I am watching my friends on Facebook unfriend people because they post about killing police or because they post about the criminal record of one of the black males and blame him for his own death. Most disturbing I have seen my black friends checking in to make sure everyone is safe and accounted for. They should not have to live in such fear. It has taken us centuries to get where we are today. And solutions do not come easily. But they will not come at all if too many of us remain silent. Straight people can march with LGBT. White people can fight for Mexican rights. Why can we not value black lives? That is not to say the blame fully lies with police. This is on all of us. We need to unify in all parts of our lives: church, work, neighborhood, and community. I will never know the fear a black person feels when stopped by police. Or the fear a black mother has for her son. And I have no idea how to make a difference in my world. I can only go one relationship at a time. Yes All Lives Matter. But Black Lives Matter TOO.

Archery

Archery: the sport, practice, or skill of using a bow to propel arrows; from the Latin arcus. Historically used for hunting and combat. Traditional bows are drawn by pulling the string directly back. The archer looks down the length of the arrow to carefully aim and draws the arrow back as far as possible. The archer releases the arrow and it flies through the air toward the target.
Childhood and youth are a lot like that bow and arrow. Parents strive to teach the child and raise them up to be successful. Children must learn how to win and how to lose. They learn to work and to get along with others. They learn compassion. They learn values. Each lesson draws the arrow back further. In school the child learns skills to make them more successful. They learn the 3 Rs,  history, teamwork, leadership, and many other skills. By the end of high school the arrow is well drawn and the aim is true. The string is released and the young adult is ready to fly. Some things cause the arrow not to be fully drawn. The youth drops out of school or takes a Wrong path. The target is missed. Kids seldom understand and youth believe they are ready to fly. But they need to stick with it to the end and wait to be released. Then they can really fly.
Psalm 127: 4-5
Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them

Animal Wrongs

On Recent trip to a local farm supply store I spotted several people entering the store with dogs. I have watched reality shows and seen the stars sneaking animals into their hotel rooms. Service animals are going everywhere from nursing homes and schools to chemo labs to comfort people. This is all still a bit strange to me. When I was a kid I only knew two people who kept a dog in the house.  I knew one other family that had cats in the house.  It just did not seem as common as it is today.  We never had pets in the house.  We did have two dogs along the way, but both were outside dogs.  And back then most pets stayed at home unless they were farm dogs or hunting dogs.  But things changed over the years. I see pets everywhere. And I have a favorite dog though he is not mine.  I like dogs and would not mind having one of my own.  I understand all my cousins and friends who have animals and love those animals.  Animals are great.  But we have gone beyond that.  Animals are now allowed in lots of places.  The dogs I have seen are not service dogs.  Pets go shopping, to emergency shelters, to hotels, and anywhere else the owners can take them. A few years ago I saw an animal brought into a restaurant. The owners were asked to remove the animal.  But I am not sure that would happen today. And people sneak their pets in where they are not allowed.  Most of this would not bother me.  Except my mother is very allergic to all these animals.  A hug from someone who held their cat before leaving their house can put her in the hospital with pneumonia. The same thing happens if she is in close proximity to an animal or where an animal has been. If we were caught in a disaster and had to evacuate to an emergency shelter full of animals, my mother would likely not survive.  Her allergies are too severe.  But people put their right to have animals ahead of her right to breathe and live.  We will have to stop attending the extended family Christmas gathering because everyone feels the need to bring their dog.  We take our chances going to a hotel because we do not know if the previous occupant brought in an animal.  If we go to a store and other people bring animals, we have to leave.  My mother cannot even go visit my brother because they keep cats in their house.  She has tried the allergy shots.  Other allergies are improved, but animals remain high.  I am not against people having pets.  If my mother were not allergic, I might have a pet.  But I do object to the extremely low value they put on my mother's life.  Pets are left home alone when people go to work and school. It is possible to leave them home occasionally. But the rights of pets and pet owners now trump my Mother's right to breathe. So we will stay home from the store.  We will stop attending family Christmas.  We will not visit my brother.  We will be isolated because of your choices. You say "no offense," but we are offended.  And no offense but  your pet is not allowed in my house. My Mother would have to leave while we thoroughly cleaned and recleaned.  Do not be offended when we decline your invitations. We cannot risk pneumonia. No offense.  But your pet cannot come near my Mother.

YOLO

YOLO - You Only Live Once.  I have heard this so many times.  And I usually dread what comes next.  The next thing that happens is not going to be good.  Usually it's a rationalization for a bad decision.  I only have x amount of dollars left and I have bills to pay, but I really want this special item.  YOLO and buy it.  I know this is dangerous, but it looks fun.  YOLO.  I know the consequences could change my life forever.  YOLO.  I do not know who invented the term.  But I do know people use it to make BAD decisions. What would be wrong with using it to apply for that job you have always wanted?  YOLO.  I've always wanted to go on a mission trip.  YOLO.  Use it to give yourself extra courage for that good decision.  Use it to push yourself towards positive steps in your life.  Use it for good.

An Army of Crumbs

The Crumbs were in chaos.  They were cooking supper and everyone wanted to stir the pot.  The crumbs were fighting over the spoon and the pot was bubbling away unstirred.  The food was already burning and sticking to the bottom of the pot.  This was unusual.  The crumbs had a system for dividing up the work.  One gathers the supplies.  One mixes the ingredients.  One stirs the pot.  One sets the table.  But over time they had come to believe that stirring the pot was the most important job.  Now everyone one wanted to stir and the other jobs were going undone.  If this continued the food would burn and everyone would go hungry.  This had happened once before when most of the food gatherers had decided their job was most important.  They recruited the others to help gather and no one was left to mix, stir, or set the table. 
No army survives without all of the necessary parts.  Someone has to lead the army. Others have to be in charge of carrying out tasks.  Others have to do the grunt work.  Some have to be in charge of supplies.  Cooks are necessary.  MPs keep things in order.  Medical corps takes care of everyone.  It's the same with any group.  A church, a school, a major corporation, or a civic group.  If everyone is a leader, then they just end up fighting and no one gets any work done.  All of the parts are important. And the very thing that is important to the group in one situation can be irritating in another situation.   Leaders can be bossy, but they are used to stepping in and imposing order where there is none.  Followers can be indecisive.  But it's part of their willingness to follow someone else's lead.  So why is it today that everyone thinks their way is the only way.  Some people think business is all important while others are into civil rights.  Some think we need higher academics in the school while others think we need stronger vocational programs.  And everyone is so passionate about this that they pursue it at all costs.  We have war between sides and no cooperation. Republicans and Democrats used to be able to work together on things and get things done.  No more. Civic groups used to be able to accomplish things.  No more.  Churches used to be able to run the business side of things and the ministry side of things while maintaining peace.  No more.  How long will it be before we see that both sides are important and necessary?  Everyone has a part.  And if any part is left out, then everyone misses out. 

Though the fig tree withers, Yet I willl Trust Him

"God, in all my endeavors, give me enough failure to keep my hand clenched in yours and enough success to always remind me you are on my side." It happens all the time.  The door opens and someone steps confidently into a room or out into the world.  Everyone turns to look and that person strides on with confidence slightly noticing the envious stares.  It's going to be a good day.  Then finally someone works up the nerve to tell them about the toilet paper stuck to their shoe and streaming behind them.  Or maybe to tell her her skirt is stuck in her pantyhose.  Perhaps his zipper is down or his pants are ripped.  The confidence suddenly escapes only to be replaced with mortal embarrassment.
People everyday pour their hearts into projects only to have their efforts fall short.  It's easy to begin with great ideals and visions of what will be.  But as we go the road gets rougher.  As time goes on we grow tired.  A pastor pours his heart into a sermon that puts people to sleep.  A community activist organizes an event that no one attends.  A writer pens a book that sells only a few copies.  An architect designs a building that people think is ugly and worthless.  Their efforts may have been good and well intended.  But there are so many things over which they have no control.  Their confidence is shaken.
"Unless the Lord builds the House, they labor in vain that build it."  I can try all day every day, but I can't make things fall into place.  People in sales can choose a good product and get out and sell.  Sometimes sales are good, sometimes they are not.  Pastors can preach and teach and lead, sometimes folks follow and sometimes they do not.  Teachers can study and plan and build up, sometimes students show up prepared to learn and sometimes they show up on drugs or worn out from the previous night.  Workers at a ski resort can clean and organize and prepare.  It may or may not snow.  People may or may not have the money to go skiiing.  Sometimes we succeed and sometimes we fail.  Successful people have learned how to deal with failure.  We fail, fail again, and fail again.  But we kept getting up and going again until we succeeded.  We didn't quit.  We can't be disheartened by failure.  So many things are out of our control.  Pray and keep praying as we try and keep trying.  When we put our trust in God and realize we are not reponsible for the things not in our control then we can trust that eventually our dreams will come true. 
And so I put my hand in God's hand.  And I know  that as a I meet trials I can keep pushing. And I pour my heart out and give my time to make the best effort I can.  And some will think it's not enough.  But I am responsible only for my efforts.  I am not reponsible for the things I cannot control.  And when things beyond my control fail me, I will trust him more.

It Matters to This One

I remember a trip to the lake quite a few years back.  I was traveling with my parents and brother when my Dad saw a road he'd not seen before.  My Dad is known for exploring dirt roads and always having to see where it goes.  This time we were pulling a boat on a trailer behind the car.  After Dad had done some exploring and we were about to get back on our way Dad noticed the boat was not sitting right on the trailer.  He stopped and got out to investigate.  A bolt had come loose on the trailer causing one of the rails to pop out of place.  Had we gotten on the highway and gone on we likely would have lost the boat in the middle of the road.  Dad found another bolt to replace it and we all got behind the boat and started pushing it back into place so that the bolt could slide in on the trailer.  One simple bolt could have ruined our entire weekend and many trips to come.  It's like breaking a small bone in the foot and hobbling around on crutches.  One little thing breaks and it causes so many other things to topple.  But we see it differently when it comes to fixing things.  I am reminded of the story of the small boy out on the beach filled with starfish.  One by one he would pick up the starfish and toss it back into the water.  There was no way he'd ever be able to make a difference out there.  The job was too big and he couldn't even throw in a fraction of the starfish.  Most of the starfish would simply die there on the beach.  A man watched for awhile then finally approached the boy and asked why he was bothering with his task.  He wasn't going to be able to make a real difference.  All his efforts weren't going to matter to all those starfish dying on the beach.  The boy picked up a starfish and said, "It matters to this one."  Then he tossed it in the water.  Which example fits each of us?  Are we the broken toe that cripples the body?  Or are we the child doing whatever we can to make even a small difference?  Too often I'm afraid I'm the broken toe.  Content to sit where I am and wish there were something more I could do.  I can't feed all the hungry or change the attitudes of the hopeless.  But I can pick up a few cans of food and contribute.  I can encourage one person, smile at one person.  I don't have to be the entire solution.  But I at least need to be part of it.

Photo Challenge Still going

I took photos this week of the old Hotel in town.  Now it's privately owned and people live there.  But historically it was a hotel.  It's a great well preserved building here. 

I also love my new yarn and spindle.  the yarn was hand spun by a very good friend.  I can't wait to learn how to use it.







This is my mother's Christmas tree just before I took it down this year. 

Last is a photo of the fog I had to drive through this morning.  I heard it was

worse to the north.  This photo is looking back toward the Interstate and the town. 

 



Photo challenge

I read a facebook post about a photochallenge.  It somehow involves taking a photo per day.  I wondered what would happen if I took 1 photo per day.  Would it be random photos that left me wondering why I did this?  Will it cause me to stop and look at the world around me?  Will my photography improve?  Is there any benefit at all?  Is this just a random challenge someone made up to see how many people would fall for it.  I don't know what to do with the photos so I thought I would post here. These are my first two photos.  I guess we'll see where this little challenge takes me. 

Hello 2013!!

Happy New Year!!  Hoping for a very good year!  Not so sure about the number.  2012 was a very nice number.  2013 is very iffy as a number.  But we've started by getting a couple inches rain yesterday.  Congress has apparently averted the fiscal cliff.  I'm sure they'll have plenty of bad stuff to say about each other, but they got something done.  I got some really cool stuff from my Grandma;s pie safe.  Stuff I didn't even know she had.  I love the triangular plates with a place for the matching cups to sit.  I doubt any of it has value to anyone, but me.  And the deli was open at the grocery store.  So I got a great dinner.  I am finally home with nothing I have to go do.  Cool.
This year I want to improve at work.  Nothing huge, just step up a little.  I want to knit hats to give to the Lord's Pantry or something like that.  I want to serve God.  I don't want to be on a committee at church.  I want to make a housing change.  I want to visit my parents at least every four weeks.  I want to be more active physically.  I want to continue painting ceramics.  It's just too fun.
I will not promise to be organised or cook.  I will not promise to exercise every day.  I will not promise to read 20 books.  Not going to happen.
Hoping for a great year.  Trusting God through it all.

Lady uses knitting for evil

I read a newspaper story about a lady who has been knitting and crocheting for 40 years.  The article was titled "Lady crochets for Good."  It got me started thinking.  I have heard of many groups that knit or crochet hats, gloves or afghans for other people.  Caps and blankets for premies.  The same for children in shelters or hospitals.  THe same for terminally ill people.  Also prayer shawls for those with cancer or other illness.  It's nice to be able to take a skill and use it to benefit other people.  But the title of the article sounded so unusual that anyone would take those skills and use them to help others.  If that's the case then there must be millions of knitters and crocheters out there using their skills for evil. How would you use those skills for evil?  What would you write in an article titled, "Lady uses knitting for evil"? Would it be as simple as knitting blankets in colors that clash?  Or knitting items for people who could not possibly use them?  Would there be a war between those who knit for good and those who knit for evil? Would they have beady eyes? The possibilities are endless.  But it certainly make me think.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Wild Life

I was out the other day riding the fence line on the back forty.  This is a task which needs to be done all too often.  It would be way too easy to not go all the way to the back and miss a serious problem in the fence.  It is a long task, but also very enjoyable.  I see plenty of wildlife back there.  I see lots of the normal deer, rabbits, squirrels, armadillos, wild hogs, and rattlesnakes.  I occasionally see a possum, skunk or raccoon still up from a night of prowling around.  There is a wide variety of birds passing through.  Across the fence I see beavers on my neighbors creek.  I have even seen a rare sasquatch.  I very much enjoy these outings with plenty to see besides the fence.  I also check for stray cattle.  But this last week I saw a very unusual creature.  I haven't seen one in a long time, but I knew immediately what it was.  The famed unicornigator.  These animals are quite large and can be ferocious.  But they prefer to stay to themselves and therefore are rarely seen.  It has the build of a small horse with the mouth and long tail of an  alligator and of course the single horn coming off the forehead.  The feet are more like those of a rhino, but with the claws of a gator.  The skin is rough and scaly.  This is a rare creature scientists have often tried to come study.  But they never get so much as a glimpse or clear tracks.  They are left with only the tales of those who have glimpsed this magnificent creature.   And last week I too got my own glimpse before it slipped off into the creek and followed the water to it's next refuge.

Cool

I have realized recently that I am not as young as I used to be.  I think my first clue should have been the "50" on top of my last birthday cake.  Or maybe it should have been all the comments about my gray hair.  But I have noticed that I am slower than I used to be.  I have noticed that I don't have the same strength I've always had.  I think twice now before I lift something or before I jump.  Part of me still thinks I am much younger.  I still want a kayak though I am not sure I can bend the right way to actually sit in a kayak.  I still want to go play on the ski boats though I am sure I would just look like a granny out playing on skis.  On the other hand I also want things I've never wanted before.  I have a swing in my back yard so I can sit in peace and watch the birds and occasional rabbit. I have taken up knitting and I love to sit anywhere and knit.  I wear special insoles in my shoes.  My "cool" sunshades fit over my glasses and cause people to ask if I've had eye surgery.  Of course I was never cool when I was young.  But I could do anything I wanted and never think twice.  I'm not saying I'm old.  My students will say that for me.  But I'm not sure where the time went.  I don't know how I suddenly ended up here.  Some of my friends have retired.  Others are thinking of retiring.  I look at what is being required of me at work now and wonder if I could retire and do something different.  These are not the thoughts of someone twenty or even thirty.  But these are my thoughts.  So I will continue to want to play.  And I will continue to think twice.  And I will continue to wonder about retirement.  And I will know that I am not as young as I used to be.  But I will not act my age. 

Don't Worry, I Have a Plan

I think I've spent my whole life making plans.  As a child I might have planned to play with a friend down the street or to ride my bicycle.  In school I planned to get a project done or study for a test.  In High School I planned to go out with friends and began planning what I would do for the rest of my life.  In college I continued planning to study, to see friends, to work, and to work toward what I wanted to be.  Now I plan how my classroom will be set up, how I save for retirement, what my money will be spent on, where I want to go and how I want to spend my summer.  I plan how to celebrate events and I plan how to balance the work I take home with the work already at home.  I make so many plans.  And then as it always has, life happens.  The child down the street got called in for some chore or a rain storm came up.  I didn't have the materials needed for the project or I was called on to do something else and my plans got pushed back.  I begin preparing for a career only to find I don't really like that career and I need to choose another.  I want to celebrate, but all my friends are busy and we need to put it off awhile.  I save to buy a car or a piece of furniture only to have to spend the money to repair the a/c.  I plan to travel on Tuesday, but a rain storm and sudden flooding push my plans back a day or two.  I plan a trip with family only to have the family decide not to go.  I plan to be rested over the summer to be ready and fresh to start work in the fall.  But responsibility gets in the way and I have work to do.  So how will I be ready to begin school in August? Don't worry! I have a plan!

What a dream

There is something about having a dream that makes life better. It's a hope for the future. A runner has the end in view. A student looks to graduation. A singer dreams of making it big some day. When I knit I look to that finished product. I know that when I get there I will have accomplished something. Sometimes the dream will change our lives. Sometimes it only brings a sense of satisfaction once it is accomplished. We may never accomplish that dream. It may remain hidden in our hearts never realized. But the dream gives us something to work toward. We work toward retirement. We work toward a new job. We work toward fixing up an old house or car. We work toward starting a business or starting a family. Ahh to be able to dream!

Elmer Sodd

Few things are more exciting than a new lawn mower. Maybe a bunch of cattle getting loose from the sale barn and stampeding through town is more exciting. Watching the round up that follows is exciting. But getting a new lawn mower is just about as exciting. This is my new lawn mower. Well, not exactly new, but new to me. This mower is luxury after my previous mowers. I have named this mower Elmer Sodd. Elmer has quite a yard to keep up with. I hope Elmer and I have many good years together.


Today I got a couple more peach trees out in the yard. I think the one from last year is gone, except there appear to be shoots coming up from the roots. But it could take some time before those get large enough to bear fruit. So I have two new trees. I also have a couple new plum trees coming up in addition to the one I already have. And I have the gorgeous old huge pecan tree that takes up much of the yard. I am hoping to be able to have some sort of garden this year. I lost everything last year to drought and gophers. Lots of work to do.

Another Chapter closes

Our bookstore is being sold. At least I hope it is being sold. I much prefer that to closing altogether. The store has been open over two years now. So many things have happened there. I've made new friends, met new people, gotten interested in knitting, we've had parties there for all of our birthdays. Sometimes it's just a quiet place to sit and knit or to grade papers. Sometimes it's a good place to sit and converse among friends. It's the place to go every morning before school for a cup of coffee, a latte, a muffin, or a scone. I've met folks there to work on my computer, to play a game of scrabble, to study math, or study the Bible. And of course there are things only my barrista knows. We will all miss Glenn. But life is calling. I wish him well.